What Am I Going To Do When I Grow Up?

The Power of Why

Posted on: February 22, 2009

It’s a great question.  It’s a central question.  The “why” question haunts us in life.  It’s at the center of the myth of the “terrible two’s” when children go through the phase of asking why.  Often their questions are shut down.

People often hear “why” as a questioning of their judgment, their beliefs, their ego. stuck at energy level 1 or 2, many people are insecure. So, it’s an open ended question to use with care.  “What, How, and When” build relationships. “Why” speaks to the core of relationships in our sense of self.  It’s sitting right there inside fear.

Truly powerful coaching goes to Why because Why is purpose and mission. That then defines the What, How, and When.

Still, you can ask Why questions in What and How phrases: “why did you do that?” can become “What was the thinking that led to that?” or “How did you arrive that decision?”

Embracing “Why” means openness and security in questioning.  So, perhaps we focus on building the relationship and sense of self-awareness with “what, how, and when” questions and tools, like acknowledgment and validation, until that opens others to accepting why as merely joining the rhythm of our questions as part of the relationship’s harmony?

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2 Responses to "The Power of Why"

Why is it better to be alive than to be dead? Why is it better to exist than to not exist? How can anyone alive know that not-existing is less desirable than existing?

How wildly do you crave change? And yet how much of your survival behavior and spirituality is directed at avoiding change – that is, avoiding your own extinction?

How in love are you with what you have already felt, that you would rather not replace it with a new feeling?

-From “Toddler Whys and Hows”: http://mythologicalfigure.wordpress.com/2009/06/12/toddler-whys-and-hows/

[…] 12, 2009 by Matilda Beupine Why is it better to be alive than to be dead? Why is it better to exist than to not exist? How can […]

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